Realisation

Mikal has spoken over and over of the dangers and difficulties of immortality, the loneliness and the pain. That it is definitely not a guarantee for acquiring any happiness or peace. I once posted a question to him on the forum about what the more positive aspects of Immortality might be and his response is below.

The thought of possible eternal pain and loneliness does cause me anxiety at times. M has mentioned an apprentice or two who on reaching the Immortal condition then wished they could die instead.

Today I realised that a few times when I have gone deep into meditation my heart centre has been ripped open wide and I have felt an almost exquisite sense of love, and yet it has been incredibly painful. Like the love you feel for someone who you will do anything for, even give up your life for them. I’ve seen so much in those rare moments but also seen the futility of it all. Nothing really matters. And it is indeed heart wrenchingly painful. Maybe that is what M is alluding  to.

Here is his response:


"I don't write as much about the "endless realm of possibilities as an immortal" because the possibilities truly are endless, and what calls to me might have little or no interest to anyone else. It becomes a case of finding one's own unique frequency as an immortal, following not only your heart but also your predilections (which may change dramatically when you transform from organic to inorganic, from mortal to immortal.) Also, it's one of those funny little facts that if I DID talk about it, chances are no one would believe me anyway. I could tell you, for example, what a sunset and simultaneous moonrise is like on Eridani Prime, but most would take my words as a faltering attempt at fiction or, at best, bad poetry.

What I can say with certainty is that everyone who makes the leap across the mortal abyss usually sits on the edge of that abyss for a century or two, feet dangling over the side, with an expression of slack-jawed amazement, amusement, terror, and what might be best called astonishment that one hadn't "seen it" all along. Seen what? The answer. What answer? All of them. And yet... all the answers in all the worlds mean nothing without perspective, and immorality is the venue in which one gains that perspective... which takes a lifetime or 10, and what IS a lifetime (or 10) to an immortal?"

Okay, this is going to be a very controversial post.

First of all, I should say that this is something of an academic question for me. The best way to explain this is with one of the quotes from the TOTI books that connects with me the most, that “The path chooses you, you don’t choose it.” One of the most profound things I’ve realized since I discovered them is that there really has never been a time in my life when I haven’t been on the path, going all the way back to my earliest memories. I do feel that at some very deep level of my greater self I did choose it, but this is a level far removed from my dayshine personality, so in that sense “I” don’t really have a choice but to follow the path through to the end and deal with whatever situation I find myself in at that point.  

That said, there are intellectual reasons why I think it should be pursued. The books say something along the lines of “Some things will connect with you, others won’t, and you should use your intuition to distinguish between them.” One of the things that doesn’t connect with me at all is the idea that non-immortals are destroyed at death. In my opinion, the evidence as presented in books such as this https://www.amazon.com/When-Ever-Become-Dying-AFTERLIFE-ebook/dp/B01J1XO2QE/?_encoding=UTF8&pd_rd_w=uvr4d&content-id=amzn1.sym.cf86ec3a-68a6-43e9-8115-04171136930a&pf_rd_p=cf86ec3a-68a6-43e9-8115-04171136930a&pf_rd_r=143-5112000-0440917&pd_rd_wg=4gOV9&pd_rd_r=defcedfb-fbda-451c-9a5e-6dee949275dc&ref_=aufs_ap_sc_dsk overwhelmingly indicates the reality of the basic concepts of worlds after this one and reincarnation.

However, to me, this makes the necessity of immortality more, not less, urgent. In my opinion, the choice is not between a potentially negative experience in immortality and “comfortable oblivion,” it is between navigating the universe as a cohesive, lucid being or navigating it as an amnesiac, bouncing from incarnation to incarnation like a cosmic pinball with little to no control over where one is or is headed.

And lastly, while I don’t doubt that it does happen that there are personalities who are so ill-suited to immortality that they would be better off not attaining it, at a basic level, common sense would suggest pretty strongly that it is the state more conducive to stability and flourishing. It isn’t like depression, disorientation, and stress are absent from the mortal world.

Of course, all your points are valid and I don’t disagree with anything you have said. I am also not fully on board with the idea of total disintegration at death.

Though I never went looking for immortality, as long as I can remember I have always wanted so much more than what was offered by any spiritual belief system on this planet.  Then when I was at a time in my life where I was ready to hear the information, I found the website instantly and I knew this had always been my path.

The thought of even POSSIBLY reincarnating and coming back here again fills me with more dread than anything else. Never want to come back to this place, as a mortal.That is all the incentive I need.